This entire section of the book was heart-warming and heart-breaking at the same time. As I was continuing to read tonight, I found myself smiling as I read about more people who used art to move forward with their lives in New Orleans. I love hearing people's stories where art/music/poerty/etc. has had a profound impact on the way they live their lives. It has an inexplicable amount of healing power. I love being able to feel a connection (on some level) with the people who are trying to rebuild from Katrina. While I have never lost a house...have never witnessed a hurricane or seen a community fall to ruins, I have had my own life experiences where I have needed to rebuild. And had it not been for music and writing, I can truly say that I don't know if I would still be here today. Art is my saving grace. And I love having this in common with other people.
Reading these articles is opening my eyes. I feel that in a strange way I am growing as a person. And in another way I feel guilty for saying that because I have not dealt with anything remotely as devastating as the people of New Orleans have. But having read about all these people's lives, I can't help but feel more wise (in some ways). I have never felt as connected to other people as I seem to feel right now. I mean, I slightly recall feeling some kind of patriotism when September 11th happened nine years ago (thank you to all who risked their lives and best wishes to their families), but at the time, I was in 8th grade and didn't really understand the magnitude of what had happened. All I can recall is seeing people with American flags on their cars, on their lawns, on their front porches, on their shirts, in hand walking down the street, etc. And it made me feel strong and proud. All of us were together in fighting to keep our country strong and resilient. And we were. And I have always had this dire longing to belong to something larger than myself. I love the idea of community working together to build something great, something brighter, for our future. I have always wanted to make a difference. And in reading how these people strived to continue living post-Katrina makes me want to live. It makes me want to love everything I have. It makes me want to work harder. I makes me want to make a difference.
I remember feeling an overwhelming "call to duty" if you will, when the BP Oil Spill happened and I did a ton of research on how I could help, only to find out that donating money was the only way I could help. I longed to fly or drive down and help clean up the mess. All the pictures of animals covered in oil was tearing at my heart. And in that moment, I found myself wishing that I had chosen a different major -- that I had actually truly considered being a biology major or a pre-vet major, my freshman year, because then I might have had something to offer (never mind the fact that the economy of that region was completely ruined!). I checked the news daily, terrified that I would hear news of the oil reaching the Everglades. Even the mere prospect, killed me. Made me feel helpless.
I was a senior in high school when Katrina hit. And reading this text makes me regret not being more aware when the devastation occurred. I can honestly, hardly remember hearing that it had happened. I had always been (and often times still am) ignorant of the news. Often times, I have no idea what is going on in this world. And I hate myself for it because I feel like I am now at an age where I should willingly be aware of everything that is going on around me. Even my fiancee at least takes the time to read Newsweek! But no, not I. And this kind of guilt drives me nuts. The whole "I wish I had been more aware because I would have loved to go down and help rebuild the city during my spring break or over the summer before I started going to school at UNH." But it didn't happen. And I feel ignorant. I feel lazy.
And all this babbling is mainly because I feel like I too have experienced a loss. I am done reading for the night, after having read about the death of Ellen Montgomery. Somehow I came to love and admire that Cat Lady and I sit here typing, feeling an incredible void...feeling like tears should be forming, but they aren't. Chris Rose's entire article dedicated to her memory at the end of this set of articles was overwhelming, to say the least. His own experience compared to "Tuesdays with Morrie" almost did it for me. There are so many wonderful admirable people in this world. So many people that are selfless and full of love for others. I have an incredible amount of love and respect for these people.
And so I say, "Thank You."
I hope I can grow up to be just like you some day.
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